So much of my every day life
is spent focusing on
love.
A lack of it.
Making it.
Being filled with it.
This is not the first time
I've noticed such a tendency.
Typically, though,
I'm complaining.
Not tonight.
Tonight, I am grateful.
For the lack of it.
For the plethora of it.
Genuinely happy to have had
every brush with it.
No matter the hurt -
immediate or eventual.
What I regret are the days
spent soiling past laughter.
Cringing over
now-spoiled
inside jokes.
Stopping myself from revisiting
those memories.
Just because people change,
Move on...
Why sprinkle on the scorn?
No.
I may do it from time to time.
I may continue to do so,
despite this.
But deep down...
I'll always be grateful.
Indebted.
I owe you for the ache.
It has bettered me.
It has taught me.
I have grown
and I am...
getting closer.
Every step--
None a disaster.
Not one.
Each a noble attempt,
None ever being just right.
But I'm learning
what I want.
What I need.
I'd never known that before.
I'm learning.
From love,
or a lack of it.
In any case,
I love it.
No comments:
Post a Comment